the art of caring for your aging loved one

Welcome to artfulCARE

Your New Focus

By choice or by default, you have become responsible for the care of an Aging Loved One.

You are now the Primary Care Giver. You care.

Welcome to a place designed to give you a helping hand, to prepare you for the unexpected, and to help break down some walls as you respond to the call for help.

The Joys of Hum-drum

Until now, your life has been humming along.

You visit with family members, young and young at heart.

You celebrate births, birthdays, weddings, and holidays together.

Your children keep you busy with their various activities.

Your career is important to you.

Here Comes Ms. Topsy-Turvy

One day when you least expect it, life throws you a curve. You recognize that an Aging Loved One needs help.

What tipped you off?

  • Did you receive an odd phone call in the middle of the night?
  • Did Grandad have a stroke?
  • Did Mum call, upset that Dad caused a car accident?
  • Has Granny's dementia, long kept under wraps, reached the "desperation" point?

You wisely sense that all is not well. Someone needs to get a handle on the situation before it's too late.

Someone needs to ask questions and get answers.

Who is it going to be?

Look in the mirror.

That Someone is YOU!

Changes, Changes

You may have noticed some significant changes in functioning.

  • Your relative's hygiene has declined—he or she does not smell clean or does not change clothes regularly.
  • He/she has gained or lost a significant amount of weight over a period of several months.
  • He/she has grown more forgetful or confused.
  • He/she sleeps a great deal—more or less—than previously.
  • Your relative has unexplained bruises or other signs of injury.
  • His/her eating habits have changed markedly.
  • He/she has more difficulty walking or walks more slowly.
  • He/she has lost interest in activities he or she used to enjoy.
  • Your relative's feet or legs are swollen.
  • He or she loses balance, or bumps into things.
  • Your relative is short of breath or coughs frequently.
  • He or she has let the house fall into disrepair or let the bills go unpaid.
  • He or she is irritable, cries frequently, or has unusual changes in mood.
  • He or she is more withdrawn or is reluctant to leave the house.
  • Your relative is increasingly secretive or suspicious of others.
  • He or she talks about feelings of hopelessness or about not wanting to live.

It's time to take action.

Where and When to Begin?

Now, in the middle, at the beginning, wherever you can.

You will help to ensure that things happen that will ease the burden for someone who finds life increasingly burdensome. Many of your actions will be welcomed by your Aging Loved One. Some actions will be mildly unpopular. Some will be grounds for considerable stress for you or your Aging Loved One.

You Will Need …

The three things you'll need most in the next months and years are:

  • Respect for the recipient of your care—that's where we come in.
  • Practical tips and suggestions, which this site attempts to supply.
  • A sense of humour. The original artwork and other surprises found in this site are meant to provide a smile just when you need it.

You may not need all the information contained in the site. You may need pieces of it now and pieces later. Take whatever is useful.

Your Relationship …

Do you have a friendly, trusting relationship with your Aging Loved One? Count yourself exceedingly fortunate. Your path will be reasonably smooth.

Is your relationship strained or forced or unpleasant in any way? You will have to roll up your sleeves and prepare for some tough work.

Remember that you are in your new position because someone sent out a signal or a call for help.

You'll be donating your time and energy by the bucket load. Look upon your new role as Charity if that helps you.

Your Reward …

The feeling you will get by knowing that you've done everything you can to ease some of the burdens affecting your Aging Loved One.

A Memorable for you

Beautiful young people are acts of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.